YOUR Football Weekend Preview

Halloween Greetings from LOCKS of the Week. You just read our HALLO-LOCKS of the Week. Now we get the spooky details of the football weekend. It's time for Andrew's WEEKEND FOOTBALL PREVIEW:


Happy Halloween everyone. Ahhhhh…Halloween. Kids eating candy…girls out in slutty outfits…its good times. Although, not really a holiday (although I would be all for getting a day off for it) Halloween is really the first signal that Winter is coming. Before you know it, it will be Thanksgiving and then Christmas soon after. I love this time of year…not only because I am going to get a bunch of days off of work over the next two months but also because we are heading for some key November football games.

Yep, this weekend if the first few days of November and we’ve got some great football action to cover. First though…I want to talk about my favorite team, the 49ers. A little over a week ago, they axed their coach…a guy who was widely viewed as a very calm guy and sometimes maybe a little too conservative…mean, the guy wore suits on the sidelines during games for heavens sake. So what does my team do…they replace him with a crazy person.

It came out yesterday that Mike Singletary pulled down his pants last week during halftime and gave with team a tongue lashing with his pants around is ankles. Seriously.

Gotta love the 49ers thinking here. Its like they are running a social experiment with their players. We replace the conservative suit wearing coach midseason and replace him with a pants dropping crazy person and see how they respond. Not sure I’m all in favor of my teams ownership running social experiments with my favorite team but it certainly makes them interesting. I mean, I’m interested in seeing what the outcome of this is. Who wouldn’t be. Unfortunately, the 49ers do not have a game this weekend so there will be no more players sent to the showers mid-game or naked halftime speeches…but on the good side, we do know the 49ers will not lose this weekend..and at least that is something. Now on to the games…

College Football

I noticed while putting in my picks for this weekends college football games that there are a bunch of spreads of 20+ points this week. What happen? We haven’t seen that since about week 3 of the season. I mean, it’s the first weekend of November…can we get a few more competitive games here please? Anyways…there are a few that you should keep an eye on…

Georgia/Florida – I mean, people refer to this game as “The World’s Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party”…you can’t miss that, right? We all remember last years game and the little stunt that Georgia pulled after they scored a TD early in that game. Will that come back to haunt them this year by setting up a Florida team for revenge? I HOPE SO! Should be a good, nasty game in Jacksonville.

Oregon/Cal – I’m not watching this game…so why am I mentioning it? Because I want to make a point. I HATE…I really mean, HATE…the PAC-10 this year. Last week I was all excited to see Texas play Okla St on ABC Saturday afternoon...but NOOOOOOOOOO. We were stuck with UCLA/CAL. Ugh! Seriously? We have be forced to watch these crappy PAC-10 teams when there are so many better games going on in college football. I don’t like it. I HATE you for being so RIDICULOUSLY BAD PAC-10. SCREW YOU AND YOUR CRAPPY GAMES!!! OK…moving along…

Texas/Texas Tech – another BIG BIG-12 GAME OF THE WEEK….and another BIG-12 game that should feature very little defense. Good times. This will be the final game in whats been a fairly brutal stretch for Texas. Watch out though…Texas Tech is at home and took down Oklahoma there last year. I expect texas to get a little post-Halloween scare in this one.

The Pros

Packers/Titans – Surprisingly, I haven’t mentioned the Titans very much this year in the WFP. I mean, they’re only undefeated. I actually gained a little more respect for them with a fairly impressive win on Monday over the Colts. This team, in a strange year with a lot of bad NFL teams, is winning with the ole’ reliable formula…great defense and a good running game. Should be a competitive game for them this week against the Packers. I’m not saying they will get their first loss…but its gotta happen sometime soon, right?

Jets/Bills – You know, I was a little disappointed in my Bills last week (not really “my” Bills). I had bought into them and was giving them the edge to win a fairly weak AFC east. Then they go and lose to the stupid Dolphins. Really Bills? Ugh. Now they seem to be in a dogfight for the division with the Patriots. Ugh. I think they’ll win this week though…with the help of some Brett Favre interceptions. Yay!

Cowboys/Giants – now, this game would be A LOT better if Tony Romo was playing. I mean, then I would at least give the Cowboys a chance winning. With Brad Johnson..not so much. Still, its always fun to watch a Cowboys team that everyone was drooling over at the beginning of the season lose…so even if its not close, this game will be VERY watchable.

Patriots/Colts – last year around this time, when these two teams played each other, they were both 8-0. This year...not so much. Surprisingly, the Patriots are still tied for the lead in the AFC east despite no Brady. Meanwhile, the Colts are getting old fast…really fast. This could be their last stand…a loss and we might not see this team come January. In fact, I’d actually like to see a January with neither of these teams.

Actually, the best game this weekend might be on MNF…Steelers/Redskins. The Steelers have lost 2 games this year…both to NFC East teams. Advantage Redskins. Game is in Washington, DC the night before the election. Have you voted already? I didn’t think so. I have though! Wear it!

Ok…that’s all I got this week. Enjoy the games everyone…and happy Halloween...

Andrew Jacobsen

Dave's Chain-LOCKS of the Week... booooo!

Happy Haunting everyone...

The spooks and ghosts are out on the town tonight
America sits in and watches in fright
As the Cowboys, Lions, Dolphins, and Patriots start to fight
Do join us as we witness the wickedly flight...

of

Dave's (AAAAAHH!!)
LOCKS (EEEEEK!!!)
of the Week (NOOOOOO!!!)


Dave's LOCKS of the Week
Hallo-week 9

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH, AAAAAH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH... huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhhuh, heheheheh, hahahahahahahahahahahhhhhhhhhhh (clomp)

-- The Famous Words of Vincent Price

Good Evening... you are about to enter the Dungeon of Doom... AND NEVER COME BACK!!! Time for another chilling good time on LOCKS of the Week.

Let's begin... Going.... DOWWWWNNN????

woohoohahahahahaha

Pipe Organ: "TWEEEEEE!"

First, to Chicago... where the Bears host the Lions coming off a bye week. 'Tis a mismatch of THRILLING proportions. So much so that the Bears own the Lions in many different ways. But this week the ghosts of Wayne Fontes and Barry Sanders will exorcise the hapless Bears and cover the humongous (+13.0) point spread.

Ashes to Ashes and Dust to Dust, up and away, to NASHVILLE we must! The Ghastly Titans are at home to play the Green Bay Flessssssh Packers. The Titans are due for a let down game... but not today! We shall be witness to a Tennessee Chainsaw Massacre on the Packers as the Titans (-5.5) win by at least a touchdown. BRRRRR-RUM-RUM-RUM!!!

Now we go Six Feet Unnnnder to the depths of THE BLACK HOLE. Welcome to Oakland, CA. The Oakland Raiders are up against the upstart Feasting Falcons. The Falcons are favored by a field goal (-3.0), and are sure to get that margin. Give the points to the Falcons.... IF YOU DARE, MUAHAHAHAHHH.

That covers this monster mash on

Dave's (zap!)
LOCKS (fwa-POW!!)
of the Week (BOOM!)


Happy Halloween everybody!!!


Recap: Lions (+13.0) cover at Bears; Titans (-5.5) cover at home; Falcons (-3.0) cover at Raiders

...and THAT's why they call them LOCKS of the Week!

Boy am I pumped up!! PUMPED baby!!

The Tennessee Titans were deadlocked with the Indianapolis Colts, 14-14. And then, like Blitz Lightning (tm), the Titans stormed ahead with two touchdowns. A grand flurry which put the Titans above the pack as the best team in the AFC!

So it was... Dave's final LOCK of the Week covered in the last ten minutes of the game. Was I excited or what?! The Colts scored one last touchdown on a Peyton Manning QB sneak, but even that was not enough to dent the 4 point spread. Titans win! Titans cover! 31-21.

I covered again!!! So my LOCKS of the Week go 2-1 in Week 8, bringing our grand total TO...


10-13-1!!


It's the hottest ticket in town! Dave's LOCKS of the Week!!!

New York City... SUPER GIANTS!

PITTSBURGH-- Who needs a terrible towel when you have a terrific front four?

"3-4 THIS!!!" said the New York Football Giants, crushing the Steelers offensive line when it counted most, during the fourth quarter. The running game was weak for Pittsburgh. Essentially, the Steelers brought a paper knife to a gunfight, and the Giants defeated the Steelers in an odd one, 21-14.

Worse than this, Ben Roethlisberger threw four interceptions, which led to several Giants field goals. Only ONCE, did the Giants score a touchdown. Outside of that, it was the field goals, and a very awkward safety off a bad snap to the punter. The ball fluttered past the "Orlovsky Zone" and went for a safety. It was so baffling, even the computerized box score reported "undefined."

"Baffling" basically sums up Sunday evening. The game had hard hits, lots of turnovers, and was not one for the faint of heart, but wouldn't you know, the Giants' defense carried the G-Men to a win.

Most striking about Sunday's big matchup was that, the game asked more questions than it answered. Just how good are Pittsburgh's special teams? How did the Giants fare so poorly in the Red Zone? Could the Steelers' offensive line be overrated?

Who between these two teams is legitimate? Perhaps neither of them are. After all, it didn't seem like either team executed much offensively. Still, somebody had to win, and on this night it was the New York Giants. Well earned victory for the Giants, and well timed, with some tough games coming up.

It was an exciting moment for football, but the mystery continues: Who are the best teams in the NFL? Tonight's Monday Night Football between Indy and Tennessee will give us some more... revealing clues. Come solve with us, won't you?

YOUR Weekend Football Preview

Andrew Jacobsen brings another one of his Weekend Football Previews. I'm sorry for delivering this late, fellas. Busy week. So now, in tardy fashion, is the WEEKEND FOOTBALL PREVIEW:

DAMN! This has been a LOOOOONNNNNGGGG week. Seriously, it seems like its been almost a month since I’ve watched any good football action…when really its been only two weeks (not counting last week which was void of any quality college or NFL football games). Since that time, my favorite team fired its head coach, Tom Brady had 8 more knee surgeries, Brett Favre called 3 football teams to tell them how to beat the Packers, Jim Haslett became the best coach in football, PacMan punched 2 more of his body guards, and, apparently, Tony Romo broke his pinkie again. Its just crazy…

Well, in just a few hours the weekend will be here. Before it starts, lets preview the weekend ahead…

College Football Saturday

#6 Oklahoma St/ #1 Texas – once again the #1 team will be tested against another highly ranked opponent…and like the times before, this should be a Texas win. Wow was Texas impressive last week against Missouri…and I hate them for it. Them winning all but finished off my bet for Missouri to win the National Championship. Hey, it was 17-1 odds…come on, give me a break! Plus, who would have guessed Penn. State getting there at the begging of the year?

#7 Georgia/#11 LSU – FINALLY! A good SEC game on CBS. Its only been about a month since they’ve had one of those. This one should be pretty good. BTW…the best quote I heard all week was from Les Miles, who…when asked about that ridiculous hit that referee put on the South Carolina player last weekend in their game against LSU…said “YOU GOTTA WRAP UP! Didn’t wrap up!” Awesome. I hope he wins just because of that. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M75sj4Z4Wic

#3 Penn St/ #9 Ohio St – Damn! Again, I’m forced to talk about Ohio State here. Ugh. Well, this actually is an interesting game (maybe the last one in the BIG-10 this year). With a win, Penn State will have the inside track to the national championship game as they will should be heavily favored in every game they play the rest of the year. Still, in the crazy college football world we live in these days, no win is a sure thing…particularly when your head football coach is 135 years old. Seriously, who is coaching this team?

#5 USC/Arizona – Like Penn State, this should really be the final test for USC this year..Arizona, somehow, is actually a pretty decent team. Although, knowing USC, they only lose the games in which they are favored by 30 points or more…so they should win this one easily.

Pro Athletes Sunday

Chargers/Saints in London – I’ve gotta admit, I don’t mind these games played in other countries half way around the world. I really don’t. I mean, I never go to the games anyways and always just watch them on TV, so why would I care where they play the games? They could have these games played in remote regions of Africa and I wouldn’t care. This matchup is actually interesting too.

Bucs/Cowboys – I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I hope the Bucs win this week. Imagine the scene in Dallas next week if that happens? Oh man. What a circus. That might give us our 4^th head coach to be fired this year. Awesome. I’m all for it. BUT…for some reason I think Dallas pulls this one out. Desperate football teams almost always do..particularly when at home…and Dallas is a desperate football team right now.

Giants/Steelers – Ahhhhhhh, some solid afternoon entertainment. Despite both teams having only 1 loss, I’m still…for whatever reason…not really solid on either one. I mean, that could just be because I’m not sold on ANY team this year in the NFL…but I just don’t trust any football team week to week right now.

Of course, we also need to keep an eye on the BUNGLES/TEXANS and REDSKINS/LIONS games this weekend and hopefully the dream of an 0-16 season remains alive. (BTW…I think both those matchups could be closer then people think. Watch out!)

There it is boys and girls…enjoy your weekend.

Andrew Jacobsen

Dave's Weekly Pizza Pick

Mmmm... Olives! I don't know how it happened, but I have been craving a thin crust Olive Pizza all week long. Nothing fancy, just a basic cheese pizza with an olive topping. I don't think it even connects to any theme for any of the games.

The weekly pizza pick is: Olive pizza fresh from the oven! Delicious, hot, and somewhat succulent.

Week 8: Dave's LOCKS of the Weak

In the beginning... there was space...
Then there was time...
and soon... there were

Dave's (fwoosh!)
LOCKS (flash!)
of the Week (gush!)

Dave's LOCKS of the Week
Week 8

Hi again, everyone and welcome back to LOCKS of the Week. In all the one years I've done LOCKS, I never had a tougher week than this one. I must say this is the hardest LOCKS of the Week ever picked. These LOCKS are going to be weeeeeaaak, but never fear, sports fans! Take pride in these picks and walk away happy, just don't bet too much on any of them so you don't come running after me... OK!!

So with humility, to the picks...

Let's jump start this thing over in HOUSTON! Reliant Stadium is so good to me. First, it helped us shake out 0-fer week by narrowing the field. Go Texans! Then it helped save my LOCKS a week ago. Go Lions! Now I'm about to go to the well ONE more time.

I know this is dangerous. I can't keep riding the same team all year long, but dammit, these guys are a big part of 0-fer watch, those Texans. Without them, the NFL would be a whole lot of 8-8. Who needs that? Instead lets be reliant on Houston's team to........ keep it close! The Bungles are back. Oh yeah, and look at this: Would you believe that both teams are ranked near the bottom of the NFL in turnover ratio? Yeah I know, me and my turnovers. Hey, I go with what works, and what won't work is either team keeping the ball. Watch for the eee! ooh! aaah! hot potato all afternoon and watch for Cincy to COVER the (+9.5) points at Houston. Don't be surprised to see a Bungle uprising!

Houston can't possibly win three in a row, can they?

ONWARD!

From the humid heat of Houston to the hot beaches of Miami and out to Dolphin Stadium! The Dolphins are at home again to avenge their last loss to Baltimore. While last week, the Fins feebily flopped, this week the Dolphins will Diligently Dominate the Buoyant Buffalo Bills! Why buoyant? The Bills scored a huge win at home against the Chargers in Week 7, but this week is a different story. Buffalo is, dum dum dummmmmmmmm, on the Road!

The Bills have a +31 point differential, worst among division leaders. Over 6 games, that means an average margin of victory of five points a game! Clearly, the Bills are a fluke waiting to happen. Let's not forget, they have yet to beat a team currently above .500.

So how does it all add up? The Fins Fight to a big cover (+1.5) slathered with tartar sauce. Go Fish for a fresh catch, straight from the ocean to you!

Now we'll sail up the Atlantic from Miami to Nashville Tennessee. The Titans are home this week to play the Indianapolis Colts. Music City Miracle you say? No sir! The Titans are legit. They won every game but one by at least seven points. They're the best cover team over the last 2-3 years. They're playing one of the most fragile teams in the division, they being the Indianapolis Colts. It could be a good game, but I like the odds for Tennessee. Give the points to the Titans, all (-4.0) of them and let's boogie!

That, mercifully, brings an end to a very precarious

Dave's (creeeeaaaaaak)
LOCKS (snap!)
of the Week (Aieeeeeeeeeeee!)


Again this is going to be a really tough week. I have a tough feeling about this one, but I'll give it the best shot. Enjoy, boys and girls!


Recap: Bungles (+9.5) cover at Texans; Dolphins (+1.5) cover at home; Titans (-4.0) cover at home.